lørdag 18. februar 2012

Maverick Limerick

It amused me to hear the tale
Of this fat chap who once set sail
Seeking new adventures
Forgetting his dentures
And now he’s as thin as a rail

His travels brought joy and grief
Especially Great Barrier Reef
Where he met a sweet girl
Whose name was Pearl
Turns out, she was but a thief

He wanted to leave right away
Lack of money caused him a delay
Pearl had cleaned him out
There is really no doubt
That this was his worst ever day

As you know he was rather fat
He was also as blind as a bat
Lack of teeth in his mouth
No more money for clout
All he had left was his hat

So here he was on his own
No-one there was prepared to loan
Any dosh to a stranger
Who might be a danger
Not even some change for the phone

He told the gathering crowd
Yes he was in fact very loud
That he had loads of dosh
And he was rather posh
And of that he was really proud

Then Pearl reappeared on the scene
And said sorry for being so mean
I lost my mind
With you being so kind
I just wanted to keep you keen

She said she had searched all day
Worried sick that he’d gone away
She had borrowed his money
For white bread and honey
Hopefully that was OK

Now our friend was not sure what to do
But considered his options were few
Being in such a mess
He would hardly impress
Any girls with his henna tattoo

He decided to go back with Pearl
Though he still didn’t trust the girl
She had been such a cow
But it would do for now
He thought he would give it a whirl

Next morning he bought some new teeth
Pearl said gosh you are handsome, Keith
He fell for her charm
And grabbed hold of her arm
Lets go get your bridal wreath

They wed in the registry office
Had a party at the local hospice
All Pearl’s friends came along
For a drink and a song
But instead they got biscuits and coffees

Now, if you have no teeth but a tummy
Like Keith, you can still be yummy
If you try really hard
And play your best card
Such as waving about with your money

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